


Undying

by DailyDianakko



Category: Little Witch Academia
Genre: 200 follower celebration, Cursed, Do not cross post to other sites, F/F, My Immortal AU, i cried, i suffer, kill me, no beta its my fucking immortal
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-01-31 13:49:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 11,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21447220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DailyDianakko/pseuds/DailyDianakko
Summary: What would you do if you were a vampire AND sexy?
Relationships: Atsuko "Akko" Kagari/Amanda O'Neill, Diana Cavendish/Amanda O'Neill, Diana Cavendish/Atsuko "Akko" Kagari, Diana Cavendish/Atsuko "Akko" Kagari/Amanda O'Neill
Comments: 26
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter 1

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Hi my name is Akko Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way-Kagari and I have long chestnut brown hair (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and flaming red eyes like burning coals and a lot of people tell me I look like Megumi Han (AN: if u don’t know who she is get da hell out of here!). [[I’m not related to Ryosuke Kanemoto but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I’m a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I’m also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Luna Nova in England where I’m in the seventh year (I’m seventeen). I’m a goth (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was walking outside Luna Nova. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.

“Hey Akko!” shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Diana Kavendish!

“What’s up Diana?” I asked.

“Nothing.” she said shyly.

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.

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The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was snowing and raining again. I opened the door of my coffin and drank some blood from a bottle I had. My coffin was black ebony and inside it was hot pink velvet with black lace on the ends. I got out of my coffin and took of my giant MCR t-shirt which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a black leather dress, a pentagram necklace, combat boots and black fishnets on. I put on four pairs of earrings in my pierced ears, and put my hair in a kind of messy bun.

My friend, Lotte (AN: Fumiko Orikasa dis is u!) woke up then and grinned at me. She flipped her long chin-length orange carrot hair with pink streaks and opened her limpid blue eyes. She put on her Marilyn Manson t-shirt with a black mini, fishnets and pointy high-heeled boots. We put on our makeup (black lipstick white foundation and black eyeliner.)

“OMFG, I saw you talking to Diana Kavendish yesterday!” she said excitedly.

“Yeah? So?” I said, blushing.

“Do you like Diana?” she asked as we went out of the Red team common room and into the Cafeteria.

“No I so fucking don’t!” I shouted.

“Yeah right!” she exclaimed. Just then, Diana walked up to me.

“Hi.” she said.

“Hi.” I replied flirtily.

“Guess what.” she said.

“What?” I asked.

“Well, Good Charlotte are having a concert in Blytonbury.” she told me.

“Oh. My. Fucking. God!” I screamed. I love GC. They are my favorite band, besides MCR. “Well…. do you want to go with me?” she asked.

I gasped.

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On the night of the concert I put on my black lace-up boots with high heels. Underneath them were ripped red fishnets. Then I put on a black leather minidress with all this corset stuff on the back and front. I put on matching fishnet on my arms. I straightened my hair and made it look all spiky. I felt a little depressed then, so I slit one of my wrists. I read a depressing book while I waited for it to stop bleeding and I listened to some GC. I painted my nails black and put on TONS of black eyeliner. Then I put on some black lipstick. I didn’t put on foundation because I was pale anyway. I drank some human blood so I was ready to go to the concert.

I went outside. Diana was waiting there in front of her flying car. She was wearing a Simple Plan t-shirt (they would play at the show too), baggy black skater pants, black nail polish and a little eyeliner (AN: A lot fo kewl gurlz wer it ok!).

“Hi Diana!” I said in a depressed voice.

“Hi Akko.” he said back. We walked into her flying black Mercedes-Benz (the license plate said 666) and flew to the place with the concert. On the way we listened excitedly to Good Charlotte and Marilyn Manson. We both smoked cigarettes and drugs. When we got there, we both hopped out of the car. We went to the mosh pit at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we listened to Good Charlotte.

“You come in cold, you’re covered in blood They’re all so happy you’ve arrived The doctor cuts your cord, hands you to your mom She sets you free into this life.” sang Joel (I don’t own da lyrics 2 dat song).

“Joel is so fucking hot.” I said to Diana, pointing to him as he sung, filling the club with his amazing voice.

Suddenly Diana looked sad.

“What’s wrong?” I asked as we moshed to the music. Then I caught on.

“Hey, it’s ok I don’t like him better than YOU!” I said.

“Really?” asked Diana sensitively and she put her arm around me all protective.

“Really.” I said. “Besides I don’t even know Joel and he’s going out with Hilary fucking Duff. I fucking hate that little bitch.” I said disgustedly, thinking of her ugly blonde face.

The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Diana. After the concert, we drank some beer and asked Benji and Joel for their autographs and photos with them. We got GC concert tees. Diana and I crawled back into the Mercedes-Benz, but Diana didn’t go back into Luna Nova, instead she drove the car into……………………… the ARCTURUS FOREST!1!1!

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Chapter 4. AN: I sed stup flaming ok AKKOS’s name is AKOBY nut mary su OK! DIANA IS SOO IN LUV wif her dat she is acting defrent! dey nu eechodder b4 ok!

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“DIANA!” I shouted. “What the fuck do you think you are doing?”

Diana didn’t answer but she stopped the flying car and she walked out of it. I walked out of it too, curiously.

“What the fucking hell?” I asked angrily.

“Akko?” she asked.

“What?” I snapped.

Diana leaned in extra-close and I looked into her gothic red eyes (she was wearing color contacts) which revealed so much depressing sorrow and evilness and then suddenly I didn’t feel mad anymore.

And then…………… suddenly just as I Diana kissed me passionately. Diana climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. She took of my top and I took of her clothes. I even took of my bra. Then she put her magic thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.

“Oh! Oh! Oh! ” I screamed. I was beginning to get an orgasm. We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. And then….

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!”

It was…………………………………………………….Finnelan! 

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(Da only reson Finelann swor is coz she had a hedache ok an on tup of dat she wuz mad at dem 4 having sexx!)

Finnelan made and Diana and I follow him. She kept shouting at us angrily.

“You ludacris fools!” she shouted.

I started to cry tears of blood down my pallid face. Diana comforted me. When we went back to the castle Finelam took us to Professor Croixx and Professor Urusoola who were both looking very angry.

“They were having sexual intercourse in the Forbidden Forest!” she yelled in a furious voice.

“Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?” asked Professor Urusla.

“How dare you?” demanded Professor Croix.

And then Diana shrieked. “BECAUSE I LOVE HER!”

Everyone was quiet. Finrelam and Professor Croix still looked mad but Professor URsoola said. “Fine. Very well. You may go up to your rooms.”

Diana and I went upstairs while the teachers glared at us.

“Are you okay, Akko?” Diana asked me gently.

“Yeah I guess.” I lied. I went to the girl’s dorm and brushed my teeth and my hair and changed into a low-cut black floor-length dress with red lace all around it and black high heels. When I came out….

Diana was standing in front of the bathroom, and she started to sing ‘I just wanna live’ by Good Charlotte. I was so flattered, even though she wasn’t supposed to be there. We hugged and kissed. After that, we said goodnight and she reluctantly went back into her room.

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The next day I woke up in my coffin. I put on a black miniskirt that was all ripped around the end and a matching top with red skulls all over it and high heeled boots that were black. I put on two pairs of skull earrings, and two crosses in my ears. I spray-painted my hair with purple.

In the Great Hall, I ate some Count Chocula cereal with blood instead of milk, and a glass of red blood. Suddenly someone bumped into me. All the blood spilled over my top.

“Bastard!” I shouted angrily. I regretted saying it when I looked up cause I was looking into the pale white face of a gothic girl with spiky red hair with orange streaks in it. She was wearing so much eyeliner that I was going down her face and she was wearing black lipstick. She didn’t have glasses and now she was wearing red contact lenses just like Diana’s. She had a manly stubble on her chin. She had a sexy English accent. She looked exactly like Arisa Shida. She was so sexy that my body went all hot when I saw her kind of like an erection only I’m not Diana so I didn’t get one you sicko.

“I’m so sorry.” she said in a shy voice.

“That’s all right. What’s your name?” I questioned.

“My name’s Amanda O’neill, although most people call me Vampire these days.” she grumbled.

“Why?” I exclaimed.

“Because I love the taste of human blood.” she giggled.

“Well, I am a vampire.” I confessed.

“Really?” she whimpered.

“Yeah.” I roared.

We sat down to talk for a while. Then Diana came up behind me and told me she had a surprise for me so I went away with her.


	2. Chapteer 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grab a vodka. You need it.

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Diana and I held our pale white hands with black nail polish as we went upstairs. I was wearing red Satanist sings on my nails in red nail polish (AN: c doez dat sound lik a Maru Sue 2 u?). I waved to Vampire. Dark misery was in her depressed eyes. I guess she was jealous of me that I was going out with Diana. Anyway, I went upstairs excitedly with Diana. We went into her room and locked the door. Then…………

We started frenching passively and we took off each others clothes enthusiastically. She felt me up before I took of my top. Then I took off my black leather bra and she took off her pants. We went on the bed and started making out naked and then she put her magic thingy in mine and we HAD SEX. (c is dat stupid?)

“Oh Diana, Diana!” I screamed while getting an orgasm when all of a sudden I saw a tattoo I had never seen before on Diana’s arm. It was a black heart with an arrow through it. On it in bloody gothic writing were the words………… Vampire!

I was so angry.

“You bastard!” I shouted angrily, jumping out of the bed.

“No! No! But you don’t understand!” Diana pleaded. But I knew too much.

“No, you fucking idiot!” I shouted. “You probably have AIDs anyway!”

I put on my clothes all huffily and then stomped out. Diana ran out even though she was naked. She had a really big magic you-know-what but I was too mad to care. I stomped out and did so until I was in Vampire’s classroom where she was having a lesson with Professor Chariot and some other people.

“VAMPIRE O’NEILL, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!” I yelled.

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Everyone in the class stared at me and then Diana came into the room even though she was naked and started begging me to take her back.

“Akko, it’s not what you think!” Diana screamed sadly.

My friend Sucy Manbaravan smiled at me understatedly. She flipped her long waste-length gothic purple hair and opened her crimson eyes like blood. She had pale white skin that she was wearing white makeup on. Sucy was kidnapped when she was born. Her real parents are vampires and one of them is a witch but Voldemort killed her mother and her father committed suicide because he was depressed about it. She still has nightmares about it and she is very haunted and depressed. It also turns out her real last name is Manbaravan and not Murase. (Since she has converted to Satanism she is in Slytherin now not Griffindoor. )

“What is it that you desire, you ridiculous dimwit!” Croix demeaned angrily in her cold voice but I ignored her.

“Vampire, I can’t believe you cheated on me with Diana!” I shouted at her.

Everyone gasped.

I don’t know why Akko was so mad at me. I had went out with Vampire (I’m a lesbian and so is Akko) for a while but then she broke my heart. She dumped me because she liked Hannah, a stupid preppy fucker. We were just good friends now. She had gone through horrible problems, and now she was gothic. (Haha, like I would hang out with a prep.)

“But I’m not going out with Diana anymore!” said Vampire.

“Yeah fucking right! Fuck off, you bastard!” I screamed. I ran out of the room and into the Forbidden Forest where I had lost my virility to Diana and then I started to bust into tears.

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I was so mad and sad. I couldn’t believe Diana for cheating on me. I began to cry against the tree where I did it with Diana.

Then all of a suddenly, an horrible man with dark eyes and no nose and everything started flying towards me on a broomstick! He didn’t have a nose (basically like Voldemort in harry potter) and he was wearing all black but it was obvious he wasn’t gothic. It was…… PAUL HANBriDGE!

“No!” I shouted in a scared voice but then Paul grabbed my arm and I couldn’t run away.

“ARCAS!” I shouted at him. Paul fell of his broom and started to scream. I felt bad for him even though I’m a sadist so I stopped.

“AKKO.” he yelled. “Thou must kill Vampire O’neill!”

I thought about Vampire and her sexah eyes and her gothic red and orange hair and how her face looks just like Arisa Shida. I remembered that Diana had said I didn’t understand, so I thought, what if Diana went out with Vampire before I went out with her and they broke up?

“No, Paul!” I shouted back.

Paul gave me a gun. “No! Please!” I begged.

“Thou must!” he yelled. “If thou does not, then I shall kill thy beloved Diana!”

“How did you know?” I asked in a surprised way.

Paul got a dude-ur-so-retarded look on his face. “I hath telekinesis.” he answered cruelly. “And if you doth not kill Vampire, then thou know what will happen to Diana!” he shouted. Then he flew away angrily on his broomstick.

I was so scared and mad I didn’t know what to do. Suddenly Diana came into the woods.

“Diana!” I said. “Hi!”

“Hi.” she said back but her face was all sad. She was wearing white foundation and messy eyeliner kind of like a pentagram (geddit) between Arisa Shida and Yoko Hikasa.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

“No.” she answered.

“I’m sorry I got all mad at you but I thought you cheated on me.” I expelled.

“That’s okay.” she said all depressed and we went back into Luna Nova together making out.

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I was really scared about Paul all day. I was even upset went to rehearsals with my gothic metal band Lotte Gothic 666 Nightfall. I am the lead singer of it and I play guitar. People say that we sound like a cross between GC, Slipknot and MCR. The other people in the band are Sucy Poi’son, Vampire, Diana, Barbara (although we call her Diabolo now. She has black hair now with blue streaks in it.) and Holbrooke. Only today Diana and Vampire were depressed so they weren’t coming and we wrote songs instead. I knew Diana was probably slitting her wrists (she wouldn’t die because she was a vampire too and the only way you can kill a vampire is with a c-r-*-s-s (there’s no way I’m writing that) or a steak) and Vampire was probably watching a depressing movie like The Corpse Bride. I put on a black leather shirt that showed off my boobs and tiny matching miniskirt that said Simple Plan on the butt. You might think I’m a slut but I’m really not.

We were singing a cover of ‘Helena’ and at the end of the song I suddenly bust into tears.

“Akko! Are you OK?” Lotte Go’thic 666 Nightfall asked in a concerted voice.

“What the fuck do you think?” I asked angrily. And then I said. “Well, Paul came and the fucking bastard told me to fucking kill Amanda! But I don’t want to kill her, because, she’s really nice, even if she did go out with Diana. But if I don’t kill Amanda, then Paul, will fucking kill Diana!” I burst into tears.  
Suddenly Diana jumped out from behind a wall.

“Why didn’t you fucking tell me!”she shouted. “How could you- you- you fucking poser muggle bitch!” (c is dat out of character?)

I started to cry and cry. Diana started to cry too all sensitive. Then she ran out crying.

We practiced for one more hour. Then suddenly Finnelan walked in angrily! Her eyes were all fiery and I knew this time it wasn’t cause she had a headache.

“What have you done!” She started to cry wisely. (c dats basically nut swering and dis times she wuz relly upset n u wil c y) “Akko Diana has been found in her room. She committed suicide by slitting her wrists.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God stays in heaven for fear of what he created.


	3. CaPter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just like in canon, everyone wants to fuck akko

“NO!” I screamed. I was horrorfied! Lotte Go’thic 666 Nightfall tried to comfort me but I told her fuck off and I ran to my room crying myself. Holbrock chased after me shouting but she had to stop when I went into my room cause she would look like a perv that way.  
  
Anyway, I started crying tears of blood and then I slit both of my wrists. They got all over my clothes so I took them off and jumped into the bath angrily while I put on a Linkin Park song at full volume. I grabbed a steak and almost stuck it into my heart to commit suicide. I was so fucking depressed! I got out of the bathtub and put on a black low-cut dress with lace all over it sandly. I put on black high heels with pink metal stuff on the ends and six pairs of skull earrings. I couldn’t fucking believe it. Then I looked out the window and screamed… Lunkic was spying on me and she was taking a video tape of me! And Pices was masticating to it! They were sitting on their broomsticks.  
  
“EW, YOU FUCKING PERVS, STOP LOOKING AT ME NAKED! ARE YOU PEDOS OR WHAT!” I screamed putting on a black towel with a picture of Marilyn Mason on it. Suddenly Vampire ran in.  
  
“MOOORWAAWA!” she yelled at Lunkic and Piceese pointing her womb. I took my gun and shot Loonkic and Peeses a gazillion times and they both started screaming and the camera broke. Suddenly Hoobrock ran in. “Akko, it has been revealed that someone has - NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” she shouted looking at Lunick and pieces and then she waved her wand and suddenly…  
  
Nelson ran outside on her broom and said everyone we need to talk.  
  
“What do you know, Nelson? You’re just a little Hogwarts student!”  
  
“I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT….” Nelson paused angrily. “BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST!”  
  
“This cannot be.” LAnick said in a crisp voice as blood dripped from her hand where Holbrooke’s wand had shot her. “There must be other factors.”  
  
“YOU DON’T HAVE ANY!” I yelled in madly.  
  
Piceses held up the camera triumelephantly. “The lens may be ruined but the tape is still there!”  
  
I felt faint, more than I normally do like how it feels when you do not drink enough blood.  
  
“Why are you doing this?” Peices said angrily while she rubbed her dirty fin on her hat.  
  
And then I heard the words that I had heard before but not from her. I did not know whether to feel shocked and happy or to bite her and drink her blood because I felt faint.  
  
“BECAUSE…BECAUSE….” Nelson said and she paused in the air dramitaclly, waving her wand in the air. Then swooped she in singing to the tune of a gothic version of a song by 50 Cent.  
  
“Because you’re goffic?” Lunkic asked in a little afraid voice cause she was afraind it meant she was connected with Satan.  
  
“Because I LOVE HER!”  
  
  
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I was about to slit my wrists again with the silver knife that Duana had given me in case anything happened to her. She had told me to use it valiantly against an enemy but I knew that we must both go together.  
  
“NO!” I THOUGHT IT WAS NELsOOM but it was Vampire. She started to scream. “OMFG! NOOOOO! MY HEMMROID HURTS!” and then….. her eyes rolled up! You could only see her red whites.  
  
I stopped. “How did u know?”  
  
“I saw it! And my vein turned back into the hemmerpiod!”  
  
“NO!” I ran up closer. “I thought you didn’t have a hemorrhoid anymore!” I shouted.  
  
“I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation.” she said back. “Anyway my vein hurt and it turned back into the hemmeroid! Save me! then I had a vision of what was happening to Duana…………….Paul has her in bondage!”  
  
Anyway I was in the school nurse’s office now recovering from my slit wrists. Lunkick and Peeses and NELSOM were there too. They were going to St. Mango’s after they recovered cause they were pedofiles and you can’t have those fucking pervs teaching in a school with lots of hot gurlz. Chariot had constipated the cideo camera they took of me naked. I put up my middle finger at them.  
  
Anyway Nelson came into my hospital bed holding a bouquet of pink roses.  
  
“AKjew I need to tell u somethnig.” she said in a v. serious voice, giving me the roses.  
  
“Fuck off.” I told her. “You know I fucking hate the color pink anyway, and I don’t like fucked up preps like you.” I snapped. Nelsom had been mean to me before for being gottik.  
  
“No Akkeo.” Neelson says. “Those are not roses.”  
  
“What, are they goffs too you poser prep?” I asked cause I was angry that she had brought me pink roses.  
  
“I saved your life!” She yelled angrily. “No you didn’t I replied.” “You saved me from getting a Paris Hilton p- video made from your shower scene and being vued by Lunnick and Peeses.” Who MASTABATED (c is dat speld rong) to it he added silently.  
  
“Whatever!” I yelled angirly.  
  
She pointed her wand at the pink roses. “These aren’t roses.” She suddenly looked at them with an evil look in her eye and muttered Well If you wanted Honesty that’s all you haD TO SAY! .  
  
“That’s not a spell that’s an MCR song.” I corrected her wisely.  
  
“I know, I was just warming up my vocal cordes.” Then she screamed. “Petulus merengo mi kremicli romacio(4 all u cool goffic mcr fans out, there, that is a tribute! specially for Valkyrie I love you girl!)imo noto okayo!”  
  
And then the roses turned into a huge black flame floating in the middle of the air. And it was black. Now I knew she wasn’t a prep.  
  
“OK I believe you now wtf is Duana?”  
  
Nelson rolled her eyes. I looked into the balls of flame but I could c nothing.  
  
“U c, Akkeo,” Howdybrooke said, watching the two of us watching the flame. “2 c wht iz n da flmes(HAHA U REVIEWRS FLAMES GEDDIT) u mst find urslf 1st, k?”  
  
“I HAVE FOUND MYSELF OK YOU MEAN OLD WOOMAN!” NalsOM yelled. HOWDYbrookes lookd shockd. I guess she didn’t have a headache or else she would have said something back.  
  
Neleleson stormed off back into her bed. “U r a liar, proof Hobrookee!”  
  
Anyway when I got better I went upstairs and put on a black leather minidress that was all ripped on the ends with lace on it. There was some corset stuff on the front. Then I put on black fishnets and black high-heeled boots with pictures of Billie Joe Armstrong on them. I put my hair all out around me so I looked like Samara from the Ring (if u don’t know who she iz ur a prep so fuk off!) and I put on blood-red lipstick, black eyeliner and black lip gloss.  
  
“You look kawai, girl.” Sucy P’oison said sadly. “Fangs (geddit) you do too.” I said sadly too, but I was still upset. I slit both of my wrists feeling totally depressed and I sucked all the blood. I cried again in my bathroom and put the shades on so Lunnkick and ppeses couldn’t spy on me this time. I went to some classes. Vampire was in the Flying Class. She looked all depressed because Duana had disappeared and she had used to be in love with Duana. She was sucking some blood from Chole.  
  
“Hi.” she said in a depressed way. “Hi back.” I said in an wqually said way.  
  
We both looked at each other for some time. Amanda had beautiful red gothic eyes so much like Duanas. Then……… we jumped on each other and started screwing each other.  
  
“STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS!” shouted Professor Croiz who was watching us and so was everyone else.  
  
“Vampire you fucker!” I said slapping her. “Stop trying to screw me. You know I loved Duana!” I shouted and then I ran away angrily.  
  
Just then she started to scream. “OMFG! NOOOOO! MY HEMMEROID HURTS!” and then….. her eyes rolled up! You could only see her red whites.  
  
“NO!” I ran up closer.  
  
“I thought you didn’t have a hermmeroid anymore!” I shouted.  
  
“I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation.” she said back. “Anyway my hemmeroid hurt and then I had a vision of what was happening to Duana…………….POOL has her bondage!”

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Vampire and I ran up the stairs looking for HobRoock. We were so scared.  
  
"HOBroock HoldbROOKE!” we both yelled. HOlbrooke came there.  
  
“What is it that you want now you despicable snobs?” she asked angrily.  
  
“PAUL has Diana!” we shouted at the same time.  
  
She laughed in an evil voice.  
  
“No! Don’t! We need to save Duana!” we begged.  
  
“No.” she said meanly. “I don’t give a darn what Paul does to Diana. Not after how much she misbehaved in school especially with YOU Akko.” she said while she frowned looking at me. “Besides I never liked her that much anyway.” then she walked away. Vampire started crying. “My Diana!” she moaned. (AN: don’t u fik gay guyz r lik so hot!)  
  
“Its okay!” I tried to tell her but that didn’t stop her. She started to cry tears of blood. Then she had a brainstorm. “I had an idea!” she exclaimed.  
  
“What?” I asked her.  
  
“You’ll see.” she said. She took out her wand and did a spell. Then…… suddenly we were in Pauls MAnsion!  
  
We ran in with our wands out just as we heard a croon voice say. “I kast GUN!”  
It was……………………………….. PAUL!  
  
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WARNING: SUM OF DIS CHAPTA IS XTREMLY SCRAY. VIOWER EXCRETION ADVISD.  
  
We ran to where PAul was. It turned out that Paul wasn’t there. Instead Duanas Cousin MErril was. Diana was there crying tears of blood. Meryll was torturing her. Vampire and I ran in front of Merill.  
  
“Rid my sight you despicable preps!” she shouted as we started shooting her with the gun she Then suddenly she looked at me and she fell down with a lovey-dovey look in her eyes. “AkkoyIloveyouwiluhavesexwithme.” she said. (in dis she is sixteen yrs old so shes not a pedofile ok)  
  
“Huh?” I asked.  
”Akko I love you will you have sex with me?” asked merrioll. I started laughing crudely. “What the fuck? You torture my gf and then you expect me to fuck you? God, you are so fucked up you fucking bastard.” I said angrily. Then I stabbed her in the heart. Blood pored out of it like a fountain.  
  
“Nooooooooooooo!” she screamed. She started screaming and running around. Then she fell down and died. I brust into tears sadly.  
  
“Morril what art thou doing?” called Pauul. Then…… she started coming! We could hear her high heels clacking to us. So we got on our broomsticks and we flew to Loona Noova. We went to my room. Vampire went away. There I started crying.  
  
“What’s wrong honey?” asked Diana taking off her clothes so we could screw. She had a sex-pack (geddit cuz shes so sexah) and a really huge you-know-what and everything.  
  
“Its so unfair!” I yielded. “Why can’t I just be ugly or plain like all da other girls and preps here except for Sucy P'oison, because she’s not ugly or anything.”  
  
“Why would you wanna be ugly? I don’t like the preps anyway. They are such fucking sluts.” answered Diana.  
  
“Yeah but everyone is in love with me! Like Liunkink and Peices took a video of me naked. Nelsom says she’s in love with me. Vampire likes me and now even Meriol is in love with me! I just wanna be with you ok Diana! Why couldn’t Satan have made me less beautiful?” I shouted angrily. (an” don’t wory Akkow isn’t a snob or anyfing but a lot of ppl hav told her shes pretty) “Im good at too many things! WHY CAN’T I JUST BE NORMAL? IT’S A FUCKING CURSE!” I shouted and then I ran away.  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please shoot me. Please. I beg for death.


	4. Chapteet 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAa

“Akko Akoo!” shouted Diana sadly. “No, please, come back!”  
  
But I was too mad.  
  
“Whatever! Now u can go anh have sex with Vampire!” I shouted. I stormed into my room and closed my black door with my blood-red key. It had a picture of Marylin Manson on it. He looked so sexy in a way that reminded me of Diana and Vampire. I started to cry and weep. I took a razor and started to slit my wrists. I drank the blood all depressed. Then I looked at my black GC watch and noticed it was time to go to Biology class.  
  
I put on a short ripped black gothic dress that said Anarchy on the front in blood red letters and was all ripped and a spiky belt. Under that I put on ripped black fishnets and boots that said Joel all over them with blood red letters. I put my chestnut brown hair out. Anyway I went downstairs feeling all sad and depressed as usual. I did sum advanced Biology work. I was turning a bloody pentagram into a black guitar. Suddenly the guitar turned to Diana!  
  
“Akko I love you!” she shouted sadly. “I dnot care what those fucker preps and posers fink. Ur da most beautiful girl in the world. Before I met you I used to want to commit suicide all the time. Now I just wanna fucking be with you. I fucking love you!.” Then…………….s he started to sing “Da Chronicles of Life and Death” (we considered it our song now cuz we fell in love when Joel was singing it) right in front of the entire class! Her singing voice was so amazing and gothic and sexxy like a cross between Gerard, Joel, Chester, Pierre and Marilyn Manson (AN: don’t u fink dos guyz r so hot. if u dnot no who dey r get da fuk out od hr!) .  
  
“OMFG.” I said after she was finished. Some fucking preps stared at us but I just stuck up my middle fingers (that were covered in black nail polish and were entwined with Diana’s now) at them. “I love you!” I said and then we started to kiss just like Hilary Duff (i fukin h8 dat bitch) and CMM in a Cinderella Story. Then we went away holding hands. Croix shouted at us but she stopped cuz everyone was clapping by how sexy we looked 2gether. Then I saw a poster saying that MCR would have a concert in Blytionbuyry right then. We looked at each other all shocked and then we went 2gether.  
  
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We ran happily to Blytoonberry. There we saw the stage where GC had played. We ran in happly. MCR were there playing ‘Helena’. I was so fucking happy! Gerard looked even sexier than he did in da pictures. Even Diana thought so, I could totally see her getting an erection but it didn’t matter cuz I knew know that we were da only true ones for eachother. I was wearing a black leather minidress and black leather platinum boots with red ripped fishnets. Diana was wearing a black baggy MCR t-shirt and black baggy pants. Anyway, we stated moshing to Helena. We frenched. We ran up 2 the front of the band to stage-dive. Suddenly, Gerard pulled off his mask. So did the others. We gasped. It wasn’t them at all. It was.,……………………….. PaUl and da parliment!  
  
“Wtf Diana im not going to a concert wid u!” I shouted angrily. “Not after what happened to me last time? Even if its MCR n u no how much I lik them”  
  
“What cause we…you know…” she gadgetted uncomfortbli cause girls don’t like to talk a bout you-know-what.  
  
“Yeah cause we you know!” I yielded in an angry voice.  
  
“We won’t do that again.” Diana promised. “This time, we’re going with an ESCORT.”  
  
“OMFG wtf/ Are you giving into the mainstream?” I asked. “So I guess ur a prep or a Christina or what now?”  
  
“NO.”she muttered loudly.  
  
“R u becoming a prep or what?” I shootd angrily.  
  
“Akoo! I’m not! Pls come with me!” Sshe fell down to her knees and started singing ‘Da world is black’ by GC to me.  
  
I was flattened cause that’s not even a single, she had memorized da lyrks just 4 me!  
  
“OK then I guess I will have to.” I said and then we frenched 4 a while and I went up 2 my room.  
  
Sucy P’oison was standing there. “Hajimemashite gurl.” she said happily (she spex Japanese so do i. dat menz ‘how do u do’ in japanese). “BTW Hannah that fucking poser got expuld. she failed al her klasses and she skepped math.”   
  
“It serves that fuking bich right.” I laughed angrily.  
  
Well anyway we where felling all deprezzed. We wutsched some goffic movies like Das niteMARE b4 xmas. “Maybe Hannah will die too.” I said.  
  
“Kawai.” Sucy P’oison shook her head enrgtically lethrigcly. “Oh yeah o have a confession after she got expuld I murdered her and den Barbara did it with her cause she’s a necphilak.”  
  
“Kawai.” I commnted happily . We talked to each other in silence for da rest uv da movie.  
  
“OH HEY BTw, im going to a concert with diana tonight in Hogsmeade with mcr.” I sed. “ I need to wear like da hotset outfit EVA.”  
  
Lotte Go’thic 666 Nightfall Nodded ENREGeticALLlY. “Omfg totally lets go shopping.”  
  
“In Hot Topic, right?” I asked, already getting out my spshcial Hot Topic Loiyalty carde.  
  
“No.” My head snaped up.  
  
‘WHAT?” my head spuin. I could not believe it. “Lotte Go’thic 666 Nightfall are u a PREP?”  
  
“NOOOO!NOOOO!” She laughed. “I found some cool goffic stores near Luna NOova that’s all.”  
  
“Hu told u abut them” I askd sure it would be Duana or Diabolo or Vampire(don’t even SAY that nam to me!). Or me.  
  
“Chariot.” She sed. “Let me just call our broms.”  
  
“OMFFG Chariot?” I asked quietly.  
  
“Yah I saw the map for blytonbury on his desk.” She told me. “Come on let’s go.”  
  
We were going in a few punkgoff stores SPECIALLY for the concerts in BLUYTONBURY. The salesperson was OMG HOTTER THAN GERARD EXCEPT NOT CAUSE THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE and he gave me a few dresses. “We only have these for da real goffs.”  
  
“Da real goffs?” Me and Sucy P’oison asked.  
  
“Yah u wouldn’t believe how many posers ther are in this town man! Yesterday Piceis and Finnelan tried to buy a goffic camera pouch.” He shook his head. “I dint even no they had a camera.”  
  
“OMFG NO THEIR GONNA SPY ON ME AGAIN!” I cried, running out of the changing room wearing a long black dress with lots of red tulle coming out and very low-cut with a huge slit.  
  
“Oh my satan you have to buy that outfit” The salesperson said.  
  
“Yeah it looks totlly hot.” Said Lotte Go’thic 666 Nightfall.  
  
“You know what I am gona give it to you free cause u look really hot in that utfit. Hey are you gonna be at the concert tonight?” he asked.  
  
“Yeah I am actually.” I looked back at him. “Hey BTW my name’s Akko Chestnut dark’ness dementia TARA way what’s yours?”  
  
“Andrew Habrige.” He said and ran a hand through his black-dyed hair. “maybe I’ll see you there tonight.”  
  
“Yeah I don’t think so cause I am going there with my gf Duana you sick perv!” I yelled angrily, but before he could beg me to go with him, Jasminkla flew in on his black broom looking worried. “OMFG AJJO U NEED OT GET BACK INTO THE CASTLE NOW!”  
  
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Andbrew gave us some clothes n stuff 4 free. He said he wud help us wif makeup if he wunted koz he was relly in2 fashin n stuff. (hes bisezual). Jasminka kept shooting at us to cum back 2 LUNA NovA. “WTF NelSon?” I shouted angrily. “Fuck off you fjucking bastard.” Well anyway Barbara came. Jasminka went away angrily.  
  
“Hey bitch you look kawaii.” she said.  
  
“Yah but not as kawaii as you.” I answered sadly cause Boobra’s really pretty and everything. She was wearing a short black corset-thingy with blood red lace on it and a blak blood-red miniskirt, leather fish-nets and black poiny boots that showed off how pale she wuz. She had a really nice body wif big bobs and everything. She was thin enouff 2 be anorexic.  
  
“So r u going 2 da concert wif Diana?” she asked.  
  
“Yah.” I said happily.  
  
“I’m gong with Diabolo (thatz Hannuah).” she anserred happily. Well anyway Duana and Diabolo came. They were both loking extremely hot and sexy and u could tell they thoufht we were ot 2. Diabolo was wearing a black t-shirt that said ‘666’ on it. She was wearing tons off makeup jus like Marylin Manson. Diana was wearing black leather pants, a gothic black GC t-shirt and black Vanss he got from da Warped tower. Lotte Go’thic 666 Nightfall was going 2 da concert wif Dracola. Dracola used to be called Frank but it tuned out dat he was kidnapped at birth and his real family were vampires. They dyed in a car crash. Frank converted to Satanism and he went goth. He was a peasant now.He gav up noblles. He was wearing a black Wurped t-shirt, black jeans and shoes and black hair wif red streekz in it. We kall him Dracula now. Well anyway we al went 2 Diana’s black Mercy-Bens (geddit cuz wer gpffik) that her mom Berenadete gave her (berfore she died). We did pot, coke and crak. Diana and I made out. We made fun of dose stupid fuking preps. We soon got there…….I gapsed.  
  
Gerard was da sexiest guy eva! He locked even sexier den he did in pix. He had long raven blak hair n piercing blue eyes. He wuz really skinny and he had n amazing ethnic voice. We moshed 2 Helena and sum odder songz. Sudenly Gerard polled of his mask. So did the other membez. I gasped. It wasn’t Gerard at all! It was an ugly NOble man wif Wrinklez and eyes... Every1 ran away but me and Diana. Duana and I came. It was…….Paul and da Nobles!  
  
“U moronic idiots!” he shooted angstily. “Ajjo, I told u to kill Vampire. Thou have failed. And now……….I shall kill thou and Diana!”  
  
“No no please!” We begged sadly but he took out his knife.  
  
Sudenly a gothic old woman flu in on her broomstick. She had lung black hair and a looong black bread. She wus werring a blak robe dat sed ‘avril lavigne’ on da back. She shotted a spel and Paul ran away. It was…………………………………Hilberoook!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've lost track of everything and anything. Help me. I'm dying. Only My Immortal, nothing else.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> h e l p

I woke up the next day in my coffin. I walked out of it and put on some black eyeliner, black eyesharrow, blood-bed lipstick and a black really low-cut leather dress that was all ripped and in stripes so you could see my belly. I was wearing a skull belly ring with black and red diamonds inside it.  
  
(Da night before Diana and I rent back to the skull (geddit skull koz im goffik n I like deth). Holbrooke chased Pool away. We flew there on our brooms. Mine was black and the broom-stuff was blood-red. There was lace all over it. Diana had a black MCR boom. We went back to our rooms and we had you-know-what to a Linkin Park song.)  
  
Well anyway I went down to the Grate Hall. There all da walls were painted black and da tables were black too. But you fould see that there was pink pant underneath the black pant. And there were pastors of poser bands everywhere, like Ashlee Simpson and the Backstreet Boys.  
  
“WTF!” I shouted going to sit next to Lotte Gothic Night’fall 666 and Barbara. L’Ote Gothic Nightfall 666 was wearing a black leather mini with a Good Chraloote t-shirt, black fishnets and black pointy boots. Barbara was wearing a long gothic blak dress with blood red writing that was all lacy and came up to your thighs and black boots and fishnets. Vampire, Dracula and Diana came. We started to talk about who was sexier, Mikey or Gerard Way or Billie Joe Armstrong. The girls joined in cause they were bi.  
  
“Those guys are so fucking hot.” Andrew was saying as suddenly a gothic old woman with a black beard and everything came. She was the same one who had chassed away Paul yesterday. She had normal tan skin but she was wearing white foundation and she had died her hare black.  
  
“……………….HOOLBROOKE?1!” we all gasped.  
  
“WTF?” I shouted angrily. “I thought she was just wearing that to scare Paul!”  
  
“Hello everyone.” she said happily. “As u can see I gave the room a makeover. Whjat do u fink about it?”  
  
Everyone from the poser table in Gryiffindoor started to cheer. Well we goths just looked at each other all disfusted and shook our heads. We couldn’t believe what a poser he was!1.  
  
“BTW you can call me Miranda.” SHE CALLED AS WE LEFT to our classes.  
  
“What a fucking poser!” Duana shouted angrily as we we to Transfomation. We were holding hands. Vampire looked really jealous. I could see her crying blood in a gothic way (geddit, way lik Gerard) but I didn’t say anything. “I bet she’s havin a mid-life crisis!” Su’cY shouted.  
  
I was so fucking angry.  
  
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All day we sat angerly finking about Helbrooke. We were so fucking pissed off. Well, I had one thing to look forward too- da MCR concert. It had been postphoned, so we could all go.  
  
Anyway, I went to the common room sadly to cut classes. Diana was being all secretive.  
  
I asked what it was and she got all mad me and started crying all hot and angsty (rnt sensitve lesbian gurlz r so hot).  
  
“No one fucking understands me!1” she shouted angrily as her green and blonde hare went in her big blue eyes like Billie Joe in Boulevard of Borken Dreamz. Shee was wearing black baggy paints, a black MCR t-shirt and a black die. (geddit insted of tie koz im goffik) I was wearing a blak leather low cut top with chains all over it all over it a blak leather mini, black high held boots and a cross belly fing. My hair was al up in a messy relly high bun like Amy Lee in Gong Under. (email me if u wana see da pik)  
  
“Accuse me? What about me!” I growled.  
  
“Buy-but-but-” she grunted.  
  
“You fucking bastard!” I moaned.  
  
“No! Wait! It’s not what it fucking looks like!” she shouted.  
  
But it was to late. I knew what I herd. I ran to the bathroom angrily, cring. Diana banged on the door. I whipped and whepped as my blody eyeliner streammed down my cheeks and made cool tears down my feces like Benji in the video for Girls and Bois (VALK that is soo our video!). I TOOOK OUT A CIGARETE END STARTED TO smoke pot.  
  
Suddenly Avery came. she had appearated.  
  
“You gave me a fucking shock!” I shouted angrily dropping my pot. “Wtf do you fink you’re doing in da red team’s room?”  
  
Only it wasn’t just Avery. Someone else was with her too! For a second I wanted it 2 b Andrew or maybe Diana but it was HObrooke.  
  
“Hey I need to ask you a question.” she said, pulling out her black wanabe-goffik purse. “What are u wearing to the concert?”  
  
“U no who MCR r!” I gasped.  
  
“No I just saw there was a concert dat a lot of gothz and punx were going 2.” She said. “Anyway Diana has a surprise for u.”  
  
  
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All day I wondered what the surprise was. Meanwhile, I pot on a blak ledder mini, a blak corset with urple lace stuff all over it, an black gothic compact boots. MCR were gong 2 do the concert again, since POOL had taken over the last one. I slit my wrists while I moshed 2 MCR in my bedroom all night, feeling excited. Suddenly someone knocked on the door while I was trying on sum black clothes and moshing to Fang u 4 da Venom. I gut all mad and turned it of, but sacredly I hopped inside dat it was Diana so we could do it again.  
  
“Wut de fucking hell r u doing!” I shouted angrily. It was Picies! “R u gonna cum rape me or what.” I yelled. I was allowed to say dat because Holbrooke had told us all 2 be careful around het and Nelson since she was a pedo.  
  
“No, actshelly (geddit, hell) kan I plz burrow sum condemns.”s he growld angrily.  
  
“Yah, so u can fuk ur six-yr-old gurlfriend, huh?” I shouted sarkastikally.  
  
“Fuker.” She said, gong away.  
  
Well anyway, I put on some black eyesharow, black eyeliner, and some black lipstick and white foundation. Then I went. Den I gasped…………………………………………………………….Pieces and Nelson were in da middle of da empty hall, doin it, and Finnelan was watching!1  
  
“Oh my god you ludacris idiot!” they both shooted angrily when they saw me. Finnelan ran away crying. Dey got up, though. Normally I wood have ben turned on (I luv cing the sheep of wuter) but both of them were fuking preps.  
  
“WTF is that why u wanted condoms?” I asked sadistically. (c I speld dat)  
  
“Only you wouldn’t give them to me!” Pisces shouted angrily.  
  
“Well you shoulda told me.” I replayed.  
  
“You dimwit!.” Nelson began 2 shoot angrily. And then………I took out my black camera and took a pic of them. U could see that they were naked and everything.  
  
“Well xcuse me!” they both shouted angrily. “What was dat al about?”  
  
“It wuz to blackmail u.” I snarked. “So now next time you see me doing it with my girlfriend you cant fuking rat me out or I’ll show dis to holbeook. So fuck off, u bastards!” I started to run. They chased me but I threw my wound at them and dey tripped over it. Well anyway, I went outside and there was Paul, looking extremely fucking hot.  
  
“WTF where’d Diana?” I asked him.  
  
“Oh she’s bein a fucking bastard. She told me she wouldn’t cum.” Vampire said shaking her hed. “U wanna cum with me? 2 the concert?”  
  
Then….. she showed me his flying car. I gasped. It was a black car. She said her rummate constanze had given it 2 her. The license plate on the front sed MCR666 on it. The one on da back said ‘AAKEW’ on it.  
  
……….I gasped.  
  
We flew to the concert hall. MCR were there, playing.  
  
Vampire and I began 2 make out, moshing to the muzik. I gapsed, looking at da band.  
  
I almost had an orgasim. Gerard was so fucking hot! He begin 2 sing ‘Helena’ and his sexah beautiful voice began 2 fill the hall. ……….And den, I heard some crrying. I turned and saw Diana, cryin in a corner.  
  
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Later we all went in the skull. Diana was crying in da common room. “Duana are u okay?” I asked in a gothic voice.  
  
“No I’m not u fuking bitch!”s he shouted angrily. She stated to run out of the place in a suicidal way. I stated to cry cuz I was afraid she would commit suicide.  
  
“Its ok Akki.” said Vampire comfortly. “Ill make her feel better.”  
  
“U mean you’ll go fuck her wont you!” I shouted angrily. Then I ran 2 get Diana. Vampire came too.  
  
“Diana please come!” she began to cry. Tears of blood came down her pail face. I wuz so turned on cuz I love sensitive lesbun gurlz. (if ur a homophone den fuk of!)  
  
And then………………………….. we herd sum footsteps! Vampire got out her blak invincibility coke. We both gut under it. We saw the janitor Meenotar there, shouting angrily with a flashlight in his hand.  
  
“WHOSE THERE!” he shouted angrily. We saw a rat come. It went unda da invisibility cloke and started to meow loudly.  
  
“IS ANY1 THERE!” yelled Mr. Menotaur.  
  
“No fuck u you preppy little poser sun of a fukcing bich!” Vampire said under her breast in a disgusted way.  
  
“EXCUS ME! EXCUS ME WHO SED DAT!” yelled Mr. Norris. Den he heard the rat meow. “RAT is der any1 unda da cloak!” he asked. The Rat nodded. And then……………………….Vampir frenched me! She did it jus as…………………….. Mr. Mentouar was taking of da cloak!1  
  
“WHAT DA-” he yelled but it was 2 late cuz now we were ruining away frum him. And den we saw Duana crying n bustin in2 tearz and slitting her rists outside of da school.  
  
“Diana!” I cried. “R u okay?”  
  
“I guess though.” Diana weeped. We went back to our coffins frenching each other. Diana and I decided to watch Lake Placid (c isnt da deprezzin) on the gothic red bed together. As I wuz about 2 put in the video, my eyes rolled up and suddenly I had a vision of something that was happening now. There was a knok on the door and Fafnir and da Mystery of Magic walked into the school!1  
  
  
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All day everyone talked about the Misery of Magic. Well anyway, I woke up the next day. I was in my coffin so I opened the door. I was wearing blak lacey leather pajamas. Then I gasped.  
  
Standing in front of me where………………. B;loody Lotta Nighdfall 666, Vampire, Diabolo, Diana, Dracula and Barbara!  
  
I opened my crimson eyes. Barbara was wearing a tight black leather top with pictures of bloody roses all over it. Under that she wart a black poofy skirt wit lace on it and black gothic boots that was attached to the top. Vampire was wearing a baggy Simple Plan t-shirt and baggy black pants and Vans. Diana was wearing a black MCR t-shirt and blak jeans and a leather jacket. She looked just likee Gerard Way, and almost as fucking sexy. Vampire looked like Joel Madden. B’loody Lotte Nightf’all 666 was wearing a tight black poofy gothic dress that she had ripped so it showed of all her clearage with a white apron that said ‘bich’ and other swear words and MCR lyrics on it kind of like one dress I had seen Amy Lee wear once. Darkness (who is Avery) was there too. She was weaving a ripped gothic black dress with ripped stuff all over it and a lace-up top thing and black pointy boots. So were Hannah and Wangari. It turns out that Darkness, Diabolo, Hannahs and Wangaru’s dad was a vampire. He committed suicide by slitting his wrists with a razor. He had raped them and stuff before too. They all got so depressed that they became goffik and converted to Stanism.  
  
“OMFG” I yielded as I jumped up. “Why the fuck are u all here?”  
  
“Akki something is really fucked up.” Duana said.  
  
“OK but I need to put my fucking clothes on first.” I shouted angrily.  
  
“It’s all right. We have to go now and you look kawaii anyway. Your so fucking beautiful.” Diana said in a sexy voice.  
  
“Oh all right.” I said smiling. “But you have to tell me why your being all erective.”  
  
“I will I will.” she said.  
  
So I just put on some black eyeliner, black lipstick and red eyeshadow and white foundation. Then I came. We all went outside the Lucbh room and looked in from a widow. A fucking prep called Chole from Purple Teeam was standing next to us. She was wearing a pink mini and a Hilary Duff t-shirt so we put up our middle fingers at her. Inside the Great Hall we could see Holbreooke. FAFNIE was there shouting at Hobroooke. Finnelam was there too.  
  
“THIS CANNOT BE!” she shouted angrily. “THE SCHOOL MUST BE CLOSED!”  
  
“PAUL IS PLANNING TO KILL THE STUDENTS!” yelled Fafrnir.  
  
“YOU ARE NOT FIT TO BE THE PRINCIPAL ANY LONGER!” yelled Finnelan. “YOU ARE TOO OLD AND YOUR ALZHEIMERS IS DANGEROUS! YOU MUST RETRY OR PAUL WILL KILL YOUR STUDENTS!”  
  
“Very well.” Holbrooke said angrily. “Butt we cannot do this. We can’t close the school. There is only one person who is capable of killing Paul and she is in the school. And her name is…………………………………………………………………..Akko Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way.”  
  
Diana, Hannah, Barbara, Darkness, S’ucky, Vampire and B’loody Lotte Nightfall 666 looked at each other………I gasped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> end me. Too much cursed content. I need bleach. Send booze.


	6. chapter 6

The door opened and Proffesor Finnernon and faneer stomped out angrily. Then HObknob and Crocus sawed us.  
  
“MR. AKARGU WHAT THE BEEP ARE YOU DOING!” FInneraln shouted angrily. Holbrooke blared at her.  
  
“Oops she made a mistake!” she corrupted her. “She means hi everybody cum in!”  
  
Well we all came in angrily. So did all the other students. I sat between Darkness and diana and opposite B’loody Mary. hannah and Barbara started 2 make some morbid jokes. They both looked exactly like Ville Vollo. I eight some Count Chocula and drank som blood from a cup. Then I herd someone shooting angrily. I looked behind me it was………Vampire! She and Diana were shooting at eachother.  
  
“Vampire, Diana WTF?” I asked.  
  
“You fucking bustard!” yelled Diana at Vampire. “I want to shit next to her!1”  
  
“No I do!” shouted.  
  
“No she doesn’t fucking like u, you daugheter of a bitch!” yelled Diana.  
  
“No fuck you motherfucker she laves me not you!” shouted Vampire. And then……………… she jumped on Diana! (no not in dat way u perv….unless…) They started to fight and beat up each other.  
  
Holbrooke yelled at them but they didn’t stop. All of a sudden…… a terrible man with brown eyes and ugly face flew in on his limo. He had bad hair and was wearing a blue suit. All the glass in the window he flew thru fell apart. Avery that fucking prep started to cry. Vampire and Diana stopped fighting….I shopped eating….Everyone gasped. Da room fell silent………………….Pool Hambrige!  
  
“Akko…..Ahblow…….” Paul sed evilly in his raspy voice. “Thou havfe failed ur mission. Now I shall kill thou and I shall kill Vampire as well. If thou does not kill her before then I shall kill Diana too!”  
  
“Plz don’t make me kill her plz!” I begged.  
  
“No!” he laughed crudely. “Kill her, or I shall kill hre anyway!” Then he flew away cackling.  
  
I bust into tears. Diana and Vampire came to contort me. Suddenly my eyes rolled up so they looked all cool and gothic. I had a vision were I saw some lighting flash and then Voldremot coming to kill Diana while Duana slit his wrists in a depressed way.  
  
“No!” I screamed sexily. Suddenly I locked up and stopped having the vision.  
  
“akos Akko aure you alright?” asked Diana in a worried voice.  
  
“Yeah yeah.” I said sadly as I got up.  
  
“Everyfing’s all right Ako.” said Vampire all sensetive.  
  
“No its not!” I shouted angrily. Tearz of blood went down my face. “OMFG what if I’m getting possessed like in Da Ring 2!”  
  
“Its ok gurl.” said B’loody Mary. “Maybe u should ask Proffesor Woody about what the visions mean though.”  
  
“Ok bich.” I said sadly and den we went.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im drinking


	7. oh fuck go d why

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ASDKslfdsmavaJKD

I was so excited. I fellowed Diana wandering if we where going 2 do it again. We went outside and then we went into Duana’’s black car.

“Ako what the fuck did Profesor Chation say.” whispered Diana potting her gothic whit hand with bvlak nail polish on mine.

“She said she would tell me what the visions meant torromow.” I grumbled in a sexy voice. She took out a heroin cabaret and spiked it, and gave it to me to spork. She started to fly the car into a tree. We went to the top of it. Diana put on some MCR.

“And all the things that you never ever told me  
And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me.” sang Gerard’s sexy voice. We started tiling of each other’s cloves fevently. She took of my blak thong and my black leather bar. I took of her black boxers (shez butch okau??). Then……………………… she put her trobbing you-know-what in my tool sexily.

“OMFG Diana Diana!” I screamed having an orgism. We stated frenching passively. Suddenly………… I fell asleep. I started having a dream. In it a black guy was shooting two goffik women with long red and poople hair.

“No! Please don’t fucking kill us!1” they pleaded but he just kept shooting them. He ran away in a red car.

“No! Oh my fucking god!11” I shouted in a scared voice.

“Akko what’s wrong?” Diana asked me as I woke up opening my icy blue eyes.

I started to cry and tears of blood went down my face. I told Diana to call Vampire. She did it with her blak Likin Park mobile. Butt the worst thing was who the ppl who were shot in the dream where……………………… Croiz and URkala!111

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sufernig


	8. vampires r frendly

A few mutates later Vampire came 2 da tree. She was wearing a blak leather jackson, black leather pants and a Good Chralotte t-shirt.

“Hi Vampire.” I said flirtily as I started to sob. Diana hugged me sexily tryont to comfrot me. I started to cry tears of blood and then told them what happened.

“Oh fuck it!” Vampire shouted angrily. She4 started to cry sadly. “What fucking dick did that!”

“I don’t know.” I said. “Now come on we have 2 tell Holbook.”

We ran out of the tree and in2 da castle. Brooke was sitting in her office.

“Sire are mothers have been shot!” Diana said while we wipped sum tears from hher white face. “Aokk had a vision in a dreem.”

Holbeek started to cockle. “Hahahaha! And How due u aspect me to know Akkie’s not divisional?”

I glared at Holbrooke.

“Look motherfucker.” she said angrily as Holbrooke gasped (c is da toot of crakter). “U know very well that I’m not decisional. Now get some fucking ppl out there to look for Croix and URsoola- pornto!”

“Okay.” she said in a intimated voice. “Were are they?”

I fought about it. Then all of a sudden….. “Weedinburgh.” I said. I told her which street. She went and called some people and did some stuff. After a few mistunes she came back and said people were going out looking for them. After a while someone called her again. SHe said that they had been found. Diana, Vampire and I all left to our rooms together. I went with Diana to wait in the nurses office while Vampire went to slit her wrists in his room. We looked at each other’s gothic, derperessed eyes. Then, we kissed. Suddenly Cross and Charito came in on stretchers……………………….and Proffesor peeses was behind them!1

XXXXXXXXXXX666XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Every1 in the room stated to cry happly- I had saved them. Duana, Cheerio, cCroix bond Vampire all came to hug me. The nurse started to give them medicine.

“Cum on Akok.” said Proffesor Peeses. She was wearing a gothic blak leader dress with a corset top and real vampir blood on it and fuking black platinum boots. “I have to tell you the fucking perdition.”

I locked at Urmala, Cox, Diana and Vampire. They nodded.

I smelled happily and went into a dark room. I had changed Profesor Finnleen took out some black cards. She started to look into a black crucible ball. She said……………………… “Akko, I see drak times are near.” She said badly. She peered into da balls. “You see, you must go back in time.” She took out a Time-Toner like B’loody Mary had. “When PAiul was in Looma Nova before he became powerful he gut his hearth borken. Now do you fink he would still become Ugly if he was in love?” I shook my head. “U must go back in time and sedouce him. It is the only way. If he is still evil then you must kill him. You can come to my room tomorrow and you can do it.”

“Okay.” I said sadly. We did dethz tuch sin. I went outside again sadly.

“What fucking happened?” asked Diana and Vampire.

“Yeah what happened?” asked Sucky, Lotta and Boldy Mary?

I was about to tell them butt every1 was there. They were celebrating Cocks and Urmalas being fond. Everyone was proud of me butt I jut wonted 2 talk 2 Diana. They were cheesing my name and some reporters were there, trying to interview HOlbrooke. A banner was put up. Lotz of fucking prepz were there oviously tring 2 be b goffik wering the HIM sign on their handz- depite them not having akshelly heard of him. Even the meenotor looked happy. A blak and red cake had been brought out. Hannah and Bob set up some fireworx in the shape of skulls fromthe magick shopppe.

I put on my Invisibility coke with Vampire and Driana and we sneaked outside 2gether.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX666XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

We went in2 a blak room. The wallz were blak with portraits of gothic bands lik MCR, GC and Marlin Mason all over them. A big black coffin was in the middle. Red vevlet lined da blak box. There were three chairs made of bones with real skullz in dem. I wuz wearing a blak corset bar wif purple stuff on it, fishnet suckings and a blak leather thong underneath.

I sat down one of da chairs dispersedly. So did Diana and Amanda.

“Are you okay?” Vampir asked potting her albastard hand on mine. She was wearing black nail polish. I was wearing blak nail polish with red crosses on it.

“Yah I guess.” I said sadly. Diana also pot her hand on mine sexily. I smiled sadly with my blak lipstick. “The problem is……………………….I have to seduce Paul. Ill have 2 go bak in time”

Diana started to cry sadly. Vampire hugged her.

“Itz okay Akkew.” she said finally. “But what about me? Ur not gonna brake up or anyfing, are you?”

“Of coarse not!” I gasped.

“Really?” she asked.

“Sure.” I said.

We frenched sexily. Vampire looked at us longingly.

Then………… I took off Diana’s MCR shrift and seductvely took of her pants. She was hung lik a stallone. She had replaced the Vampire tattoo that said AKko on it. Black roses were around it. I gasped. She lookd exactly lik Gerard Way. Vampire took a vido camera. (I had sed it wuz ok b4).

I took of my clothes den we were in 4 da rid of r lif.

We started freching as we climbed into the cofin. She put his spock in my you-know-what and passively we did it.

“I love you Ako. Oh let me feel u I need 2 feel u.” she screamed as we got an orgasm. We watched Vampire filmed everything perfectly. Suddenly………………………….

“WHAT THE FUCK R U DOING!”

It was………………………….NEelson and Profesor Penis!111

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shots shots shots shots

**Author's Note:**

> Help.


End file.
